Pet Memorials

Zoe Wong-Cook

Like a burst of sunlight streaming into a window early in the morning, so begins the story of Zoe Wong-Cook. She brought exuberant joy into my life with her positive and feisty spirit.

Zoe Wong-Cook entered my family in October of 2007. I had just lost Chloe (after two years of surviving melanoma and being tube fed) in August of that year. I decided to adopt from Pug Rescue, knowing that my heart and my emotional temperament had no room for raising a pug puppy. I thought that adopting a 2-5 year old was a good place to start. So, I started thinking about my new pug adoptee. As it turned out, Zoe came into my life. She was an older surrender at the age of 8. It turns out that she had turned 9 on July 10th when I brought her home at the end of October. I really wanted to be sure that her health was good as I had spent two years dedicated to Chloe’s three times a day tube feeding and so much more… I was not in a place to take on a really special needs pug. I checked Zoe’s health records and asked the rescue to have them available to me.

When I picked up Zoe from her foster mom I still was not sure that I wanted to adopt her. She was so rambunctious and so different from my docile, sweet-natured Chloe. Remember, I was a novice when Chloe came into my life from not the most reputable breeder. My ex-husband Bill purchased her and we traveled life’s journey together as a team and family. Zoe screamed blood curdling screams the minute I started up the car to take her home. Up to that point we got along great. I was not that confident that I would adopt her. She rode in a crate, but as it turns out, she was petrified of riding in a car and after trying various support systems to help keep her calm, we decided that covering her up in a crate (so she could not see out), along with some soft jazz piano music, held the key to less screaming and some barking.

When she arrived at my home that day, she was a “wild woman” running across the room and up and down the leather furniture. When she calmed down, I left her for ½ hour to run an errand, only to find that she dug into every paper bag, including my book bag with herbal cough drops. She enjoyed a small bag of M&M’s too. After that, she was crated whenever we went out to dinner or a movie or some 3-4 hour outing. She could not be left on her own. She had food obsession and also some leash aggression and she disliked dogs and other furry creatures tremendously that were on TV… she would get so upset!

Zoe also had a weight problem by all the reports from her former family vets. I took her in first thing to have her checked out and she had to have dental work done first. Then she had some eye work done as well. Thanks to the efforts of both Dr. Dunn and Dr. Smith of Animal Eye Care, Zoe’s bulbous and bright big eyes were healthier. After that, her eyes and teeth were so much better! Zoe was soon on her way to living a quality life in my household.

Our first trip to Carmel was still a time where I wasn’t sure if she was really going to stay with me. However, after that trip, it was evident that she would find a place in my heart, along with Chloe. We enjoyed all the holidays. Zoe would not wear clothes like Chloe (great to hide her feeding tube) and she hated sleeves and putting her paws through clothes. But, Velcro worked and she could wear bandanas around her neck and pearls too! We visited and came to know all of Chloe’s vets and vet techs and front desk folks. They all knew how different she was. They also knew that I was committed to Zoe’s quality of life.

Chloe’s dedicated surgeon, Dr. Doug Rohn of Bay Area Veterinary Specialists, told me that it was never too late to teach an older dog with the correct trainer or program. We enrolled and participated in doggie school for 16 weeks and it did help Zoe to be better behaved. After all, she used to devour her food without chewing! Thanks to Dr. Eleanor Dunn of Lake Vet Hospital, Zoe was on a great weight plan of 7 TD kibbles AM and PM, and holding (previously from 18 to a steady 15 pounds).

Things seem to change for our lighter days, when her inflamed disc in her back started to really bother her. The dog trainer noticed her odd gait when walking during training. Eventually within months, her hind paws would sometimes drag and one day I notices that she had bloody paws. After that, the band aid industry flourished in my household, as we discovered that was a way to prevent her from getting scraped so badly. After an MRI and many diagnostic tests, it was discovered that back surgery for that disk was not going to have a good prognosis for Zoe. I was reluctant anyway to put her through surgery at 10 years old. But, if the odds were better, I would have considered it. At this time, eastern medicine met western medicine, as we decided to have Zoe receive acupuncture. Thankfully, we found a remarkable and certified acupuncturist in Dr. Kirsten Williams of Bishop Ranch Veterinary Clinic. Zoe who was generally so feisty was so calm and so well behaved with Dr. Williams. We were relieved and grateful. Charlie Bear treats helped a lot, too, to make it less painful and more fulfilling for Zoe. Plus, we noticed a bounce in her step after she would have her acupuncture treatments. Zoe would sit with her needles in her for up to 20-to minutes with Mom Terry nearby stroking and talking to her. You see, Zoe suffered from severe separation anxiety and never let her Mom Terry out of sight! Grandma Lola was also good with Zoe all day when Mom Terry would be at work. Zoe and Mom took care of each other.

Zoe eventually suffered from a bout with pneumonia which was dealt with antibiotics. Most likely she picked it up during her MRI. Her coughing worried me so much one evening, I brought her to emergency. We though it was her inflamed disc but it was not. We also though she was doing okay until….

During the week of June 22nd, Zoe seemed lethargic and I noticed that she had some irregular breathing patterns that seemed as if she was having difficulty breathing. At that point I was becoming somewhat concerned and mentioned it to Dr. Williams at her acupuncture appointment. Soon, Dr. Dunn knew and we brought Zoe in to see her on Friday and blood was taken for diagnostic reasons. By Saturday morning, Dr. Dunn was deeply concerned and needed us to take Zoe into emergency. One thing I will say now, both Chloe and Zoe have left me on weekends or when I must depend on emergency doctors and staff that I don’t always know or trust or feel that confident about. I brought her into an emergency clinic where I did not know the doctors and I felt extremely vulnerable and all I could do is hope and pray that my Zoe would be okay. Dr. Dunn (during her weekend off) was in touch by phone with the clinic and really a lifeline to me at that critical time for Zoe. Dedication like that is invaluable and for that reason, Dr. Dunn will always have a place in our hearts.

Zoe’s stay in the emergency clinic worried me and she was not cooperating with urinating. As a rescue, dogs like Zoe have a history unknown and the one thing I knew for sure is that she would only pee on grass. And there was no grass anywhere nearby. And it was so hot. On Sunday, I offered to come and help but to no avail. Julia the tech there was an angel and so kind and patient. She spent almost an hour trying to get Zoe to pee as I did and nothing worked. Finally, I begged then to let me take her home to pee across the street at her favorite spot. I was so worried about her kidneys. And lo and behold, after I could bring her home, she saw and sniffed her grass and did her thing. She wanted her own grass and on her terms. That was my feisty and stubborn Zoe. We did not know that these were her last times spent in and nearby her home. How special those moments at that grass are to me now. Suffice it to say, Zoe died from Thrombocytopenia on Monday morning June 29, 2009, and she died in my arms. At the time I was consulting with Dr. Dunn and Dr. Clooten and considering next steps and whether we would try a blood transfusion. But, Zoe went into medical distress and…

I received her ashes back on what would have been her 11th birthday on July 10th 2009. I had been away at work training all week and came home at 4:00 p.m. to discover that her ashes were back and that I could pick them up. Life is so mysterious at times, isn’t it? That evening I had already planned for an informal gathering to honor Zoe’s memory and to give her the respect that I felt she deserved as a member of my family. I invited the vets, some techs, some friends, and we reminisced about Zoe and how much joy she brought into our lives. Although I only had her for almost two years, she has left a paw print on my heart alongside her sister, Chloe. I used to tell Zoe that she could thank Chloe for becoming a member of my family. My next rescue can thank Zoe for the legacy she left of adopting or fostering future pugs that need a loving home.

I miss her so and the final part of my story is simply this: my hope is that anyone reading this story understands that with animal specialists and with animal doctors, emergency or whatever the case may be… the connections and rapport that do exist and do matter for a pet guardian, continue on beyond the life of the pet. I will never cease to admire, appreciate and value the authentic and heartfelt compassion demonstrated upon my loss of Zoe (and Chloe) from any veterinary specialist/tech/receptionist/ at any level immediately, or after the loss. This is part of the process of owning a pet and needs to be acknowledged. A simple call or text, a card, an e-mail or any concrete acknowledgement when a client is grieving should take place as soon as possible and should not be perceived as an obligatory process. It should happen with paramount importance every time. It must be acknowledged that pets that make it to specialists or emergency clinics for assistance with any condition get there because their owner/guardian is committed to loving them and keeping them alive to live a quality life.

After losing two pugs now, I can actually say that certified grief counselor would be a welcome addition to any of these clinics. With any loss, there is perspective that becomes lost to emotional pain. If that cannot happen, then a next step of having someone who knows the client should check in with that client some days after. I believe that this is an important piece of the community that develops between client and specialty clinics. I also believe that this is a critical time for pet guardians who could absolutely use some concrete support, whether it is a follow-up call or an acknowledgment of some kind. I will say that the closest I have come to this experience is Bay Area Veterinary Specialists, due to the extraordinary compassionate and caring spirit of some key players who are still there. They know who they are and how important the work they do continues to be for so many.

And yes, if I could, I would donate a patch of green grass to be put next to every vet clinic nearby, in Zoe’s memory. A select piece of grass made a profound difference to Zoe and to me in her final days. If this story has pulled on your heartstrings, please e-mail me at binkypug@yahoo.com. I would welcome your insights and perspectives.

We Have a Secret

We have a secret, you and I
that no one else shall know,
for who but I can see you lie
each night in fire glow?
And who but I can reach my hand
before we go to bed
and feel the living warmth of you
and touch your silken head?
And only I walk woodland paths
and see ahead of me,
your small form racing with the wind
so young again, and free.
And only I can see you swim
in every brook I pass
and when I call, no one but I
can see the bending grass.Author Unknown